Negotiation is indeed an art and so is mediation. The ADR Board of V.M.Salgaocar College of Law encourages young minds to develop the perseverance, passion and conviction towards this art, and helps them identify the issues apart from persons, so that solutions rise up, and relationships stay.
VMSCL CONCORD is a board for sharing our best practices, because we stand for betterment, as a professional, as a person and as a society.
Atiha lived happily with her mother and two sisters. Poverty
had taught them the boon of sharing. Mother was a centrifugal force like sun
and kept the sisters together. As poverty began to teach advanced and tougher
lessons, sisters kept forgetting earlier lesson, one being ‘boon of sharing’.
Mother after days of hard work, fetched a jar of milk from
a milkmaid. She kept the jar in the kitchen and left to freshen up. Berha the youngest,
picked the jar and was trying to hide it in the backyard. Kriya the other
sister saw and raised alarm as she was upset about losing milk to Berha. The
fight gained third angle when Atiha joined the fight and made a claim for the
Atiha said authoritatively, “I being eldest, my interest is
first and best” she put full stop to the argument by saying, “nobody will have
Berha countered, “I saw it first, I will take it, let
anything happen today”.
Kriya not to be left behind, showing least interest in ‘rights’
and ‘evidence’ said, “I will have it, I will use my whole might to get it”. All
these were heard like an opening statement for a discussion. Then the chaos
broke out. Exchange of dialogue led to exchange of abuses and finally exchange
Before the fight turned into ugly fight, mother dawned into
the scene and held them back. She took possession of the jar and inquired, “What
happened, we are having milk after so many days, let all of us enjoy”.
Atiah, Kriya and Berha, unequivocally expressed
displeasure, mother being wise mother, asked Atiah, “You tell me, why you are
Atiah sobbingly said, “I need it, because I want it for
“keto-diet”, the fat in the milk will help in losing these flabs”. She was
looking at her waist with disgust.
Wise mother looked at Kriya, understanding the purpose,
Kriya said, “I am getting my friends in the morning. I want to give them nice
tea treat”. She looked dejected, mother knew, how badly she needs that tea
treat, she has been getting treats from her friends, this was the only chance
to give treat.
Before Kriya could complete her sentence, Berha said, I am
suffering from body heat; I am getting boils in mouth and eyes are burning. I
want it badly; I cannot sustain it any more”. Her face showed a unique
confidence. The confidence was based on her legitimate claim and extra love and
care which she enjoyed from mother.
After hearing all three, mother just walked into kitchen
with the jar. Three sisters continued to argue. Their emotions were under
control, may be because of understanding each other’s requirements. But
discussion showed the belief that, mother will decide in their favour.
Inside the kitchen, mother boiled the milk, skimmed the fat
out and grinded it to make butter and buttermilk. Remaining milk she kept
She called all sisters and said, “Here is butter for your
diet” and handed over small bowl with butter. Atiha looked pleased and ran with
butter for further experimentation.
Mother looked at Berha, she looked pleased as mother took
her interest as priority. Mother said, “Berha take care of your health, eat
well and regularly. Take this buttermilk; it will save you from present
Kriya sobbed uncontrollably. Mother gave her a container
with milk. Kriya happily hugged mother and continued sobbing, this time out of
Mother said, “I know how important this is treat for you.
Here you take these coins, get some biscuits and cookies for the treat”. Kriya
ran to the nearby shop with a great grin on her face.
Mother sighed with great relief. She looked around at all
three who were busy with their own life.
Wise mother stood up as if, she has to get ready for
another day which is not just a day but another battle thrown at her by
The first important point to be learnt is the change in the
nature of the argument when all three sisters understood each others’ needs.
This is an important lesson that, merely making demand does not suffice; there
is a need to justify the demand. Interest needs to be expressed clearly.
Secondly, wise mother spent ample time in understanding
each daughter’s requirements. This gave her clarity in chalking out future path
“Before negotiating, search for interest of
each party, these interests shows the path to be chosen”